If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize