Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
