That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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