This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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