Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
