Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
