I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
