This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
