dude i'm inner monologue high
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
