chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
