I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
