Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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