I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
