well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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