I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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