so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
