this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
