im about as happy as oj after his trial
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm at about main and main street
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
