How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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