Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize