How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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