i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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