Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
