Say something about gay babies.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
