Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize