I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize