I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
