fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
