i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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