i just google imaged poop.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
