If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize