I could have mohawked her pubes.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
you never un-have a 4some
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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