Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
