I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you would pick up someone in the library
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
