I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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