If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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