Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
