She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize