Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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