the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
