So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize