I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
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