Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
