I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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