And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
