Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
