He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
