I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
