I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
