Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
time to smoke my breakfast
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
